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Being Dumped, just plain sucks!

Hey there sweet people.

Hurricanes really suck. Even if they do not reach you, they still

threaten your safety net. Florida survived last years attack of Mother

Nature, so we are a little more courageous this year. Not much, but a

little. I would love to meet the person that pissed her off (Mother

Nature). Not only does she get even, but she does it with a vengeance.

That's like PMS & Menopause all rapped up. So, for all you poor souls

that are in for that ride(PMS & Manopause), and have no clue what it

is all about, think hurricane. It can turn in a second and destroy

you. Oh, and it has many names also, like bitch, nag, crazy, nuts,

annoying, female, insane, messed up, pms'ing, hallucinating, on drugs,

stupid bitch, mentally challenged, and that's just a few, except they

are not in an alphabetical order like the hurricanes. OK so we are

disorganized. BITE ME! You seriously have to be PMS`ing to be able to

understand (winks). I can only hope that everyone gets as many laughs

as I have so far typing this.

OK, now onto more serious matters in life. Today I received a

question from a guy. Here is what he said:

"Posted by Anonymous The last woman I was involved with was quite full of herself. So then why did she dump me?"

And my answer to him was this... "Posted by Dorothy Hey there, sorry to hear about your being dumped. Not knowing either

of you, it is really hard to answer that question. There are many

reasons for people walking away from a relationship. It could have

plain worn out. Also they could have found someone else. Either way,

it sucks, and you have to deal with the pain, and learn to get on with

your life. It is a challenge, but it does make you aware, of what

being human is all about. There is a saying; "If it doesn`t kill you.

it will only make you stronger." Also I am a firm believer in: "

Things do happen for a reason." Hang in there, things will get

better, if you let them. Take Care and thank you for sharing that with

me."

"Being Dumped" really is one of the worst experiences, short of death

that we, as humans are faced with in our lives. They say that, death

of a loved one is easier to learn to live with, than a break-up ,

"Being Dumped" or rejection.

All of the above, tell us that we are unacceptable to someone. We

immediatley turn it into ourselves and that's when the self-blame seed

is sown. Through self-blame we begin to feel shame. Shame is so

painful, that no one talks about it or even wants to think about it.

Shame is the least identified emotion we as humans deal with, because

we are ashamed of our shame. Shame, is yet another negative emotion,

that captures and imprisons us in a pit of hell. It pulls us into a

life of silence and inactivity, lying and hiding our true fears. When

we are rejected in any situation, it is a true hit to our self-esteem.

If we are weak in that area, then our fall is going to be very hard.

If we are strong in that area, we will quickly become weak. I wrote

this in a recent blog:

"When we first fall in love; What is that saying, "Love is Blind"?

Ha! Now that's funny, because it really is blind. We trust so

instantly and genuinely that we potentially set ourselves up for the

biggest fall in our lives. Why is that? Is it because we are so driven

by nature to want to trust someone? Or is trusting someone just a

happier, easier, way of life."

So there it is, we as humans, live to love and want to be loved. We

are blinded by the romance of the word ~ LOVE~. We are made happy by

the word~LOVE~, but we are also hurt by the word ~LOVE~. So why do we

continually set ourselves up? We are gambling, and we do not even

know it. Or, is life simply just that, a gamble? The bottom line is,

no one wants to get "DUMPED", because it is not in our nature to know

how to accept it. How many of you have been, "DUMPED" and just knew

that your life had ended? You just knew that you will never see

anything the same again. Well, you were partly correct there. It is

like any other change in our lives. Things will be different than we

are use to. Your life has definitely not ended. Yes, your partnership

has ended with a person, and maybe it was not expected, but nor are

hurricanes or wars. We deal with it all, we have to. We chose to

survive. Think of it as starting a new life. Newness is positive and

healthy. Look at things differently, and embrace all that newness. Do

not fear it. "BEING DUMPED", is just another chapter in your book of

life. If you had no chapters, think how dull your book would be. Now,

you can open your self to another chapter, and believe me, there are

many. If you spend the rest of your life wondering all the "WHY`S",

just think, you have wasted even more of your precious time on

something that has chosen another road. As for the fact that a person

is, full of themselves, that really has nothing to do with the "Why's"

of "Being Dumped". Even the most confident people close doors on

relationships. They in fact, have more courage to do so than a person

of less confidence, or being less full of themselves, so to speak. Who

Knows? All we know is that the decision has been made and you as a

person, with intelligence, must turn the page. Getting stuck in that

feeling just makes therapists rich. (wink) Life offers many, many

humps and bumps. We trip and fall, over and over again. The trick is

to get real good at picking yourself up and dusting off the old dirt.

This is life. I told my daughter, when she was struck by her first

cupids arrow, "If you are going to get emotionally involved, be

prepared to get emotionally uninvolved." It's life! One very important

thing we must remember; when we are at the bottom and we feel we are

worthless and will never ever TRUST again, it's is a nothing more than

a human emotion. We know it as doubt. We can over come doubt very

easily. Look in the mirror, and tell yourself, that you are UNIQUE,

and you are going to make happiness your goal. You must risk all the

falls to reach that goal. Letting yourself believe that you are

deserving of another relationship is truly a risk, again another

gamble. But what is life without a little risk? We have the power to

overcome our negative self. We just need to DO IT!!



"Self doubt is not an option!

Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we often might

gain

by fearing attempt."



Shakespear
About the Author

Dorothy Lafrinere Owner/Operater Website- http://www.womensselfesteem.com Weblog- http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy Forum- http://womenselfesteem.proboards29.com email- dorothy@womensselfesteem.com

Written by: Dorothy Lafrinere

	Web www.selfesteem.ksinclair.com

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